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  • Baseball fans have puffy hands and souvenir cups, while hockey fans have souvenir pucks and puffy eyes.
  • Sneezes can travel up to 100 miles per hour, so people should secure their nose studs.
  • A piece of grass gets bitten by a horse, but it'll be okay because it was only grazed.
  • Humpty Dumpty demands a specialist when he falls off the wall, but doesn't get one.
  • Having a tank of piranhas encourages hands-off management.
  • Dilbert goes to the doctor because his tie keeps poking him in the eye when he ties his shoe.
  • A man tells his wife he had his secretary on his laptop most of the day and she pours soup all over him.
  • Luke Skywalker accidentally stabs his face with his light saber while trying to put a flashlight under his face to look scary.
  • Two giraffes think they sense low-lying predators, but the third giraffe sensed a low-lying branch by running into it.
  • People who went to a remastered version of Slap Shot come out with bruises from the hockey pucks.
  • A man whose bed is on a cliff gets out on the wrong side and falls off the edge.
  • The bottom of a man's door causes people pain.


You searched for: injuries