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Humpty Dumpty's wife has remarried another egg, and they have 12 kids, which are eggs in a carton.
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Wife, about to get in bath, sarcastically tells husband he's romantic because instead of buying anniversary gift, he sculpted the drain hair into a heart.
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Man with big ego tells woman after a few dates, she will find him absolutely super, while she is thinking superficial.
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One clock tells another he's going to ask out Clara in accounting because he's heard she's pretty fast.
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Archie the apple wants to impress date, a pear, with his family tree, showing different apples, like Agatha tempting Adam, Jeffrey bonking Sir Issac Newton.
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Two cats on date, one cat thinks the other is embarrassing because he ordered white wine with gerbils.
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Three Tupperware containers sit on furniture while wives are out, and they are all making their lids burp with food and cans scattered everywhere.
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Fish parents tell daughter when she comes in door she can't deny it, they know she's been out with piranha, daughter has bite in body.
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Woman thanks man for bone china, says he put so much of himself into it, man lies on floor implying he has no bones.
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Man and woman standing with priest about to be married, woman tells priest to give them "the usual," implying she's been married many times.
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Man wonders if there is any hope since he met another girl who won't give him time of day, girl's wearing several clocks and watches.
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Man thinks about date, he complimented service, asked for another date, showed her food on his dental floss, wonders why she got sick and left.
