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After lumberjack cuts down tree, another tree says he knew she was lying about her age because he can see the circles on her trunk.
Woman explains her half cat-half reptile pet because her lease only allowed one pet, so she and Jim compromised by having their pets combined.
A clearly aged Charlie Brown sits on bench and wonders how he can get little gray-haired girl to notice him.
Male skelton tells female, Agatha, he suspected cheating, but didn't expect to find so many skeletons in her closet, there are real skeletons in closet.
One sauce pan tells another pot after hitting the teakettle that it will be the last time he whistles at her.
Husband apologizes to wife for coming home late, says he hit every red light on the way, car has several traffic signals stuck to front.
Spoon tells fork that first impressions are crucial with her parents, asks fork to do something with his hair, which are fork tines.
Car salesman at bar is upset, tells friend the girl never loved him, she just wanted good deal on Mercedes, implying that he was used.
Husband orange tells judge he wants divorce because he wanted kids and wife never told him she was seedless.
Woman living with tooth fairy, surrounded by teeth, says it was fascinating first, but he doesn't clean up, he's out all night and dresses funny.
Turtle stuck on back after falling off ladder agrees to take wife to dinner and movie and buy roses if she will turn him over.
Man takes hanger out of closet, hanger begs him not to hang up the tacky polyester suit because he has a big date tonight.