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Dog sitting in a stand selling other pups the chance to sniff her for $1.00, and has sign saying that cold noses are ok.
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Spider tells psychiatrist how female spider lit a cigarette, looked him in the eye, and said they didn't call him "itsy bitsy spider" for nothing.
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Frog is upset because she has a date, and there are no warts on her face.
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Stick of gum talking on phone tells friend she hasn't seen Ray all night, and he's probably stuck under some bar stool.
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Egg in the bathroom drying his hands reads note on wall saying to call Ellen because she's over easy.
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Man walking into ladies' intimate apparel store hopes no one saw him, not realizing there's a big celebration waiting because he's the one millionth customer.
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Three people in ocean, two skinny, one in middle is fat, and two sharks decide they will each get more by taking out the middleman.
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One sauce pan tells another pot after hitting the teakettle that it will be the last time he whistles at her.
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Child E asks Dad E if he'll grow up capitalized like dad, dad says yes, but he has to stay away from drugs, guns, and white-out.
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Turtle stuck on back after falling off ladder agrees to take wife to dinner and movie and buy roses if she will turn him over.
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Man with big ego tells woman after a few dates, she will find him absolutely super, while she is thinking superficial.
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One clock tells another he's going to ask out Clara in accounting because he's heard she's pretty fast.
