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  • The mayfly newspaper has births and obituaries of the same flies in one issue.
  • A man is bitten to death by sound bytes from news channels.
  • A news anchor reports that Pinocchio's nose is smaller and his skin is lighter because he's had plastic surgery.
  • A news anchor reports that the farmer's wife has been arrested for killing three blind mice.
  • A mayfly news anchor reports that another mayfly lived for 25 hours instead of 24.
  • A chicken is alarmed to find out that Sugar Maggots don't contain real maggots.
  • A snake eats the groundhog on groundhog day.
  • A dog drools all over a woman's guest.
  • Scott O'Grady ate the ants out of his ant farm when he was a child.
  • Lucy from Peanuts is arrested for practicing psychiatry without a license.
  • A news channel asks a scary questions, says news at 11, and then at 11 says the answer is no and everything is fine.
  • Barbara Walters prepares for an interview by putting crying potion in her interviewee's tea.


You searched for: news