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  • Fish is late to date in the same fishbowl because his GPS isn't working.
  • Kiss the Cook apron quickly escalated to sex in bed.
  • Woman mistakes cat scratches on headboard as tally marks for man's sexual partners.
  • Pepper shaker and vegetable pepper wind up on a bad blind date.
  • Pizza and pineapple couple sneak around because people don't think pineapple should go on pizza.
  • Snowman breaks up with snowwoman because their May-December relationship would cause them to melt.
  • Phone reassures that sex was great but was just in silent mode.
  • Firecracker dad warns kid to get off Match.com website immediately.
  • Gingerbread woman eats man she's cheating with to hide him from her suspicious husband.
  • Dasher leaves restaurant early leaving reindeer to have to pay for the bill.
  • Blowfish prefers long distance relationships for safety.

  • Last turkeys in bar are disappointed by unattractive leftover mates.


You searched for: girlfriend