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Archeologist deciphers Egyptian hieroglyphs but is baffled by symbols predicting giant scary fangs behind them.
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Chilly man mistook vibrating phone in pants pocket for shivering bum & missed wife’s text messages all day.
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Devils in hell say frustrated demon eating at table exchanged success & wealth for soup bowl by mistake.
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Pet owner exercises by live, laugh, love slogan sign & napping kitty’s sleep, sleep, sleep aspirational message.
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Motivational speaker dessert onstage teaches different food followers they all end up in the same place.
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Autocorrected holiday texts change cornucopia to happy corn utopia, pelican pumpkin pie, apple cider cipher puzzles & sneaky dog dinner leftover left rover.
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To raise money 4th of July fire works write custom messages in sky mortifying man with contagious rash.
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Embarrassed honeybee on smartphone mistakenly texts scented butt compliment.
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Dog on smartphone sends owner urgent many poop emoji text, he says bring extra bags for walk.
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Kitty sitting at laptop desk tells another it is ignoring millions of people on internet right now.
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Sleeping Russian nesting doll mother is shaken awake & asks children inside who forgot to shut off their phone.
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Autocorrected summertime texts fixes lawn mowing cats meowing, ocean surf facial hair, inflated water balloon monkey & iced coffee collie dog drink cup.
